dreamlight

27

2012-02-05T21:46:00.003+08:00

i am officially 27 years and 5 days old. maraming salamat sa lahat ng mga naka-alala. nakakatuwang makita ang mga post sa Facebook wall ko, sa mga nagtext at tumawag sa office. at sa mga bumati ng personal :D

isang bagay lang ang hiniling ko, yun ay ang batiin mo ako. natapos ang araw, kahit isang impersonal na "happy birthday", wala ako natanggap.

minsan pala, kahit na gaano mo eto ipagdasal at hilingin, kapag hindi talaga para sayo, hindi eto ibibigay.

malungkot,nakaka-iyak, masakit. pero eto siguro ang dapat.

sana dumating yung araw na malaman mo kung gaano ako nasaktan sa mga nangyari. pero ganun pa man, hindi pa din nagbabago ang tingin ko sayo. ikaw pa din yung mabait, masarap kausap at matalinong nurse na nakakwentuhan ko sa poolside ng parklane hotel cebu. iniisip ko na lang na baka may pinagdadaanan ka ngayon at gusto mo lang mapag-isa. nirerespeto ko yun....

happy birthday to me

Letting go

2012-01-22T18:12:00.002+08:00

i've been struggling for almost a month now. I know I need to let go and move on, but I can't or rather, I don't want to....

and then I saw this....

http://fatherbob-crumbs.blogspot.com/2012/01/bitiw_21.html

new 'do

2012-01-10T21:55:00.003+08:00

I always wanted to have a short hair... after office this afternoon, Leriz and I went to David's Salon - Rob Mla for a makeover session. I allowed the stylist to decide on what haircut style he will do. It's a bit pricey, but for now, I am satisfied :D

sana bukas pag gising ko, ganito pa din siya kaayos hahaha!

new year...new hairdo...new look...new me

Before 2011 ends

2011-12-31T16:55:00.004+08:00

7 hours to go before the year ends, and I'm still hoping for the impossible. Madami pang pwedeng mangyari within 7 hours. But if my heart's desire is not Yours o Lord, I will concede.

- pia

goodbye G

2011-12-31T07:06:00.002+08:00

Hi, lulubus lubusin ko na ang pagiging honest ko. Gusto ko lang naman malaman kung ano ba tayo. Matatanggap ko naman kung sasabihin mo na friends/officemates tayo. At least clear dba?

12.11.12

I sent him this message 3 weeks ago, and he did not responded, until now... he didn't even greeted me last Christmas day.

Hi, i just hope you're ok. Don't worry, I won't be bothering you anymore. I'm sorry for whatever annoyances I may have brought. Happy new year.

12.29.11

Again, I sent this message thru his Facebook, and the same thing happened.

It's 17 hours before 2012.

maybe it's just not for me.

maybe this is really goodbye.

Truly,

‎"Just because something need to be told,it does not always need to be heard" -Kevin to Robin
HIMYM s 7 ep10

wish list

2011-12-27T22:13:00.001+08:00

i only want one thing this Christmas and I already accepted the fact that I'm not gonna get it no matter how good I be. Not next Christmas nor the next after that. The only gift I receiver this year is acceptance

- post of a former classmate.same sentiments

Thank You

2011-12-11T19:13:00.003+08:00

G,

May 12, 2010

you were a snob at first, pero siguro dala na yun na bago ka lang sa grupo during that time. Natatandaan mo pa ba yung unang communication natin? thru an email. you were asking for copies of some documents you need para makapag- cash advance. alam mo bang nasa inbox ko pa din yung email mo na yun. after the forum, you went back to your place, pero you immediately added me sa Facebook :)
you had me at your smile...

July 2010

i was feeling so down due to work related issue, i posted it on Facebook. and you replied asking me what happened (you can search this blog for that particular post). you told me that i should always wear my smile...

December 2010

we made plans of extending our stay in Cebu after the forum: you, Kuya and me. unfortunately, we were not permitted to do so due to a pending WHO related workshop that i need to attend to. when you walked into Parklane Hotel's door, i was smitten.

Remember our pool conversation? we were the only ones left in the swimming pool. we immediately exchanged stories as if we were old friends. i left the pool saying "malalim na tao to"

the 4 days we spent in Cebu will always be a sweet memory to me.

upon returning to Manila, the exchange of text messages came pouring in. you even changed mobile service provider. ang saya ko nun :D

December 24, 2010

We spent the whole day texting G... as in. Kain lang ang pahinga, muntik na nga natin makalimutan batiin ang isa't - isa ng "Merry Christmas"

the rest is documented here in my blog. and 2 weeks ago, akala ko, ibibigay na yung isa sa pinaka-matagal at pinaka-nais ko na wish...

False alarm lang pala...

G,

thank you

... for the book, 8th Confession
... for the Hopia and Durian preserves
... for making me laugh
... for making me feel special
... for the constant reminder to take care of myself
... for the kilig feeling
... for being at the receiving end of my rants and issues
... for sharing your stories with me
... for trusting me
... for the kulitan and kwentuhan
... for ignoring me coutless of times, it made me realize my worth more
... for sharing your secrets, dreams and ambitions in life with me
... for helping me realize that i can go the extra mile for that someone special
... for the good memories that i will remember every time it will rain

... and lastly, thank you G for your smile. it is what started it all

Originally posted almost 2 months ago. puro rants lang naman ang laman ng blog na 'to, baka boring or masyadong emo para sa iba. pero eto kasi ang outlet ko. walang basagan ng trip :D

if ever manalo sa pa-contest ni gillboard, ireregalo ko ke G ang jacket :-)

spidey

2011-12-11T18:44:00.002+08:00

until the very last minute, i was hoping for the impossible. but then again, wala pala talaga.

While on-board the plane pauwi ng Manila, i was crying uncontrollably. Wala na kong pakialam na tingin ng tingin na yung katabi ko sa akin. The hell with them, hindi naman na nila ako makikita ulit and hindi naman nila alam kung gaano kasakit yung pinag-dadaanan ko.

I texted you before boarding:

"until the very last minute, I was hoping for the impossible, but then again, wala pala talaga. ingat ka spidey"

but you never responded.

I am hurting so much....

a year after

2011-12-10T02:03:00.000+08:00

In a few hours, i will be leaving Cebu. And i made a promise that i will leave everything and will never look back. But until the very last minute, i am still hoping for a change of heart, your heart.

It's been a year since i've said that i've left something in Cebu. It was my heart. And now, i will leave it again, broken and hurt, to start anew and maybe eventually find that special person who will make me realize why it didn't work for us.

G, i'm hoping that this will be the last time i will be writing about you. I hope you find your "star". And if you do, please don't run away. I will envy the girl who will be able to make you fall in-love.

I'm now signing off.

-Laarni
121011
0201H
Cebu City

HIMYM quote 5

2011-12-04T20:41:00.001+08:00

"Kids you can ask the universe for signs all you want. But ultimately,we all see what we wanna see, when we're ready to see it"

- HIMYM season 5 ep 24

HIMYM quote 4

2011-12-04T20:39:00.000+08:00

“You see, everyone’s got some baggage, it’s part of life. But like anything else, it’s easier when someone gives you a hand with it.”

-Ted Mosby, How I Met Your Mother season 5 ep 23

HIMYM quote 3

2011-12-04T20:38:00.001+08:00

"What you and Tony have, what I thought for a second you and I had, what I know that Marshall and Lily have, I want that. I do.I keep waiting for it to happen.I'm waiting for it to happen.I guess I'm just tired of waiting.And that is all I'm going to say on that subject." -

Ted Mosby, How I Met Your Mother

HIMYM quote 2

2011-12-04T20:37:00.000+08:00

"Just do me a favor. if ever you do meet someone special, don't run away from it, don't be me. take a shot at it, will you?"

- How I Met Your Mother

HIMYM quotes

2011-12-04T20:36:00.000+08:00

"I'm not a New York Yankee. Any other night, I would probably try to convince you that I am, but I'm not.I'm just some guy who's in love with the girl that just left. And she's... never gonna feel the same way."

- Barney Stinson, HIMYM season 4

emo shots

2011-12-02T09:13:00.003+08:00

coron vacation

2011-12-02T09:12:00.000+08:00

himym

2011-12-02T09:10:00.001+08:00

‎"Sometimes love means taking a step back. If you care about somebody, you would want them to be happy even if you wind up getting left out"-Ted Mosby, HIMYM S7 EP4
Like ·

Short vacation

2011-11-21T22:14:00.003+08:00

Just got back from a 4 day vacation in Coron. Took a short rest away from everything. But G never escaped my mind.
Masakit yung fact na online kayo pareho, pero kahit yung simpleng hi mula sa kanya, wala.
Kaya mas tumitindi yung paniniwala mo na kinakausap ka lang niya kapag kailangan niya yung tulong mo. At dahil ngayon eh wala siyang tulong na kailangan, hindi ka niya kilala.
11.20.2011

PA for hire

2011-11-21T22:06:00.001+08:00

monday night, nov 14, G texted me na me pinadala siya. So, 12 noon dumaan kami sa pal cargo ng service vehicle namin, galing nman kami sa kabilang airport so malapit lang. It turned out,delayed yung flight kaya past 1 na daw marerelease. Eh need na bumalik ng boss ko sa office,kaya di na kmi nagstay.

Nagtext ako sa hr na kung pwede ba na bukas na lng ibgay yung docs na kasama sa pinadala nya. D daw pwede kasi mapepenalize sila sa civil service at baka madelay pa yung issuance ng appointment paper ni G.

Ginawa ko, bumalik kami ng office, me inasikasong trabaho, 230pm, bumyahe ako pabalik ng airport. Pier-airport, commute kasi di na pwede magrequest ng sasakyan.

Pagdating sa pal cargo, 1 box pala yun, sabay buhos ng ulan. Para umabot ung papers nya sa hr before 5pm, napilitan ako magtaxi pabalik ng pier...

Ending, naipasa ko yung papers nya, nabigyan ko ng tig-4 bottles na spanish sardines si hr at boss, nagbayad ako ng 200 sa taxi, nag thank u siya, tapos di na ulit nagtext hanggang ngayon.

Ansaya saya.

dakilang PA ang peg ko.

Tinatawanan ko na lang, pero ang totoo,
2 nights na ko umiiyak dahil sa nangyari. sana lagi na lang siya me kailangan sakin, para lagi nya ko kakausapin...

Mantra

2011-11-13T17:07:00.000+08:00

Pretend that he doesn't exists. It hurts less. It's not worth having for...

Masakit ba kamo?

2011-11-13T17:05:00.000+08:00

Still no mention about the letter. Akala ko, pwede din ako mahalin ng taong mahal ko...

last hurrah

2011-11-06T22:59:00.002+08:00

11.04.11
Hi,
I’m not good with personal discussions, and I’m a self-confessed sucker for writing letters 
Why the popcorn? I just want to make you smile after your somewhat toxic and busy work schedule this week.

Weeks ago, I told you that you’re special. I can still remember your reply “thanks ”. Sorry for being too upfront, I’m just being myself.

May I be honest with you? I thought that the feeling’s mutual, but it seems that I’m wrong. My fault, it’s a bad case of over assuming and expecting.

There, I’ve said it. wow.

Anyway, I’m hoping that things will not be awkward between us after this, especially in Cebu this December. But if you will choose to stay away from me, I’ll try to understand and accept that it’s the consequence of what I’ve done.

Enjoy the popcorn!

laarni

leap of faith

2011-10-31T17:23:00.005+08:00

4 years ago, I made my so-called leap of faith. And no regrets so far :D but i still misses them

Someone Like You

2011-10-19T20:09:00.003+08:00

i always cry while listening to this

"never mind I'll find someone like you. I wish nothing but the best for you to" - Adele

tapos samahan mo pa neto

thank you's

2011-10-19T19:46:00.002+08:00

G,

May 12, 2010

you were a snob at first, pero siguro dala na yun na bago ka lang sa grupo during that time. Natatandaan mo pa ba yung unang communication natin? thru an email. you were asking for copies of some documents you need para makapag- cash advance. alam mo bang nasa inbox ko pa din yung email mo na yun. after the forum, you went back to your place, pero you immediately added me sa Facebook :)
you had me at your smile...

July 2010

i was feeling so down due to work related issue, i posted it on Facebook. and you replied asking me what happened (you can search this blog for that particular post). you told me that i should always wear my smile...

December 2010

we made plans of extending our stay in Cebu after the forum: you, Kuya and me. unfortunately, we were not permitted to do so due to a pending WHO related workshop that i need to attend to. when you walked into Parklane Hotel's door, i was smitten.

Remember our pool conversation? we were the only ones left in the swimming pool. we immediately exchanged stories as if we were old friends. i left the pool saying "malalim na tao to"

the 4 days we spent in Cebu will always be a sweet memory to me.

upon returning to Manila, the exchange of text messages came pouring in. you even changed mobile service provider. ang saya ko nun :D

December 24, 2010

We spent the whole day texting G... as in. Kain lang ang pahinga, muntik na nga natin makalimutan batiin ang isa't - isa ng "Merry Christmas"

the rest is documented here in my blog. and 2 weeks ago, akala ko, ibibigay na yung isa sa pinaka-matagal at pinaka-nais ko na wish...

False alarm lang pala...

G,

thank you

... for the book, 8th Confession
... for the Hopia and Durian preserves
... for making me laugh
... for making me feel special
... for the constant reminder to take care of myself
... for the kilig feelings
... for being at the receiving end of my rants and issues
... for sharing your stories with me
... for trusting me
... for the kulitan and kwentuhan
... for ignoring me coutless of times, it made me realize my worth more
... for sharing your secrets, dreams and ambitions in life with me
... for helping me realize that i can go the extra mile for that someone special
... for the good memories that i will remember every time it will rain

... and lastly, thank you G for your smile. it is what started it all

giving up

2011-10-19T19:37:00.002+08:00

After almost a year, sa tingin ko nagawa ko na lahat para maipakita na hindi lang kaibigan ang tingin ko sayo. Dinaan ko sa mga text messages na pagka sweet sweet. Pinakita ko sa pag assist sayo sa mga needs mo. Sa paghihintay at pagsama sayo hanggang sa makasakay ka ng plane pabalik sa inyo. Dinaan ko sa kanta (remember yung Migraine? "Oo nga pala, hindi nga pala tayo...") sa pagiging p.a. mo nung nandito ka sa Manila. Kahit antok na antok na ko, pinipilit ko lang to stay awake dahil i dont want to miss any text from you. I even went as far as telling you na special ka sa akin, but you just laughed and suddenly changed the topic....

Tama si Cris, hindi mo naman hiningi na gawin ko sayo yun. I did it on my own free will. Nobody told me, or forced me to do it.

Pero darating din pala yung point na sasabihin ko na ayaw ko na.

Ayaw ko na kasi masakit na kapag tinatawanan mo lang ako.
Ayaw ko na kasi nasasaktan na ko.
Ayaw ko na kasi nababalewala naman lahat ng ginagawa ko.
Ayaw ko na kasi despite ng pag eexpose ko sa feelings ko, you still remain apathetic.
Ayaw ko na kasi mas lalo pa ko nahuhulog sayo habang tumatagal.
Ayaw ko na kasi mahal na kita.
Ayaw ko na kasi alam kong hindi mo ko mamahalin pabalik.

I know i've said it many times already, but i think, this is finally it.

I give up.

pia
10.19.11

tweet tweet tweet

2011-10-19T19:22:00.002+08:00

i had the most amazing weekend when you were here in Manila. you were talking to me again G...

Singapore 3

2011-10-19T19:20:00.003+08:00

1. At the Merlion Park

2. Sentosa!

3. Siloso Beach, Sentosa

Singapore 2

2011-10-19T19:17:00.005+08:00

inside the Universal Studios....

SIngapore!

2011-10-19T19:13:00.004+08:00

1. with the Marina Bay Sands Hotel as the background

2. Goofing around with Marvin inside the Singapore Flyer

3. Ate, Nanay and Marvin at the world's largest observatory deck, Singapore Flyer

Loving Singapore

2011-10-19T19:10:00.002+08:00

one of my ultimate dream aside from getting married is to be able to have my picture taken with Merlion, the mythical creature that is associated with Singapore. and i finally did, thanks to a family trip with Nanay, Ate and Marvin last Sept 15-18, 2011.

sg

2011-09-14T21:28:00.001+08:00

Will see Merlion in a few hours...

kantahan

2011-09-04T20:05:00.002+08:00

we made it

http://pcsa2011.wordpress.com/2011/08/12/csc-ncr-bares-semi-finalists-to-chorale-competition/

competition is on tuesday, sept. 6 at the CCP Main Theater, CCP! shucks! hindi lahat ng chorale group nakakapag-perform dun hahahaha!

CCP, wait for the Bureau of Quarantine Chorale!

last shot

2011-08-29T00:17:00.002+08:00

Remember this: Going the Distance

It did not pushed thru as planned. Sabi ko nga, baka sakit na sa bulsa, sakit pa sa damdamin ang abutin ko kung pupunta ako.

4 days before the event, i've decided na tumuloy na, and andun naman si Kuya A kaya may makakasama ako. Kaya lahat ng airline companies' website, chineck ko ang schedule and airfare. Medyo mahal, pero I told myself, what the heck, kikitain ko naman yung gagastusin ko dun (considering na i have a SG trip next month).

Pero kung hindi pala talaga para sayo, the universe will conspire para hindi yun magwork. I had 2 commitments na matatamaan, and until the very last minute, hindi ko magawan ng paraan para i-move yung schedule.

I'm still wondering until now,

what if it was my last shot for "happiness"

how i met your mother

2011-07-14T16:09:00.001+08:00

my current addiction. currently on the 5th season :D
just love Ted Mosby awww...

four years

2011-04-29T15:59:00.002+08:00

April 09, 2007

Four years ago, someone broke my heart. it shattered me to pieces, thus, the birth of this blog wherein i can pour out my heart's pains.

For the longest time, I was a broken person with a broken heart. And then eventually, I was able to move on, slowly but surely.

Though I have not been in a relationship until now, the experience made me know myself more, and in knowing, comes loving :)

whose fault?

2011-04-18T20:59:00.000+08:00

Di mo kasalanang mahalin siya.
Pero di rin niya kasalanan kung di niya magawang mahalin ka

people are perpetually attracted to those who they can't get..

2011-04-16T22:36:00.002+08:00

nasasaktan na ko sa mga nangyayari. Darating din pala yung panahon na mapapagod ako sa paghihintay sa wala. i'm still clinging to that little hope that i have that maybe, things will turn 180 degrees in favor of me. Pero dapat ko na din isipin ang sarili ko, nakaka-awa na din kasi kung titingnan sa mata ng ibang tao. Pilit kong isinisiksik ang sarili ko sa isang (dalawang) tao na obvious naman na hindi ako gusto.

Bakit kaya yung mga taong hindi ka pwedeng mahalin ang siya namang pilit mong minamahal. Siguro kung magagawan ng solusyon ang mga ganitong situation, konti na lang ang malungkot sa mundo.

sana G, sinabi mo naman sa akin kung ano ang problema o reason kung bakit bigla bigla na naman mo akong hindi kinakausap.

"d worst feeling isn't loneliness its wen that someone makes u feel special then suddenly leaves u hanging.and you just have to pretend that you dont mind."

cdo

2011-04-14T14:39:00.002+08:00

G,

im here in cdo since yesterday morning. you knew it ahead of time, and yet you didn't even bother to contact me... i know that it's not your responsibility to do so, but still, im hurt.
i love you, even if you don't love me back

pia

post-radiation realization

2011-04-01T08:09:00.004+08:00

after all the stress caused by the radiation scare, i have realized this:

"i am loving the job that i have and everything that comes with it: the stress, pressure, lessons and insights taught by bossing, endless meetings, overtime and even the "tsismis", yes, even that . Taking my mind off on some things is a plus factor it offers."

BS

2011-03-31T14:11:00.004+08:00

before the march 14 "date", we were supposed to meet feb 09 but for some reasons, he wasn't able to come.

bumawi, hence this http://dreamsemperfidelis.blogspot.com/2011/03/starting-over-again.html

i was in his area for a 2 - day consultative meeting last Mondays. i texted him if he wants to have merienda afterwards, he did not answer.
next day, tuesday, he greeted me "good morning", being the polite person that i am, i answered back.

J: me seminar ka pa?
L: oo, last day mamya
J: sori kahapon, hindi na ko nakapagreply
L: ok lang, don't worry
J: sayang ang merienda hehehe
L: eh kasi baka pag ininvite na naman ulit kita, hindi ka na naman pwede. nakakahiya
J: try mo ulit hehehe
L: hahahaha, sige. ofis ka? baka gusto mo magmerienda mamaya?
J: wat time?
L: til 5pm ka db? 530pm or earlier?
J: earlier
L: ok, mas maganda. wat time?
J: 3pm
L: ok (i was thinking na if halfday ang meeting, i'll just drop by tita's office para dun magpalipas ng oras)
J: ok
L: trinoma?
J: cge

and i thought that we're already settled since nagconfirm naman siya.
ang nangyari, bossing asked me to accompany him sa isang presscon sa Timog. late na natapos kaya we decided na hindi na lang umattend sa meeting. so we came back sa office, arrived there at 1pm. pahinga lang ng konti, then nagpaalam na ko ng 145pm since considered as naka-in na ko.
i arrived at Trinoma at exactly 3pm, freshened up a bit, naglakad papuntang Powerbooks. after 15 minutes, i texted him.

L: text ka lang, andito lang ako sa POwerbooks.

his reply?

J: sori, can't come.

he stood me up. again. BS

walang konsepto ng "heads up"

hence my Facebook's stat:

for sale: MANNERS, sampu isang tumpok

should

2011-03-20T17:29:00.002+08:00

I SHOULD:
never expect
never demand
never assume

SHOULD KNOW:
my limits
where i stand
my role

DON"T:
get affected
get jealous
get paranoid

I'll JUST:
go with the flow
and stay happy

starting over again

2011-03-15T19:41:00.002+08:00

malungkot, masakit, nakaka-miss. Pero hindi titigil ang mundo ko dahil doon...
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

date

2011-03-15T08:16:00.006+08:00

remember this http://dreamsemperfidelis.blogspot.com/2011/01/letters-to-nowhere.html

well, we went out again last night. met up with him sa Trinoma, had dinner sa Brother's. Our follow up date before last night, the one in Rob Mla, did not went well. actually, it didn't happen for some reasons only he can answer hehehehe.

after that, polite naman ako and friendly pa din so continous ang pagsend ko ng SMS sa kanya. pag nangamusta, eh di sasagutin. pag hinde, ok lang. Naisip ko, di ko naman ikakamatay kung hindi ako replyan hahahaha!

anyway, he invited me last Sunday. wala naman akong gagawin so i said yes.

and it went ok :D

for now, yun lang muna :D

Close to You

2011-03-07T13:28:00.001+08:00

"Bakit kung sinabi ko ba sayo dating mahal kita noon, sasabihin mo rin sa aking i love you too?"

-Palits

last night

2011-03-06T08:07:00.003+08:00

Last night was a disaster. a disaster that i know will come sooner or later.

i was watching Lilo and Stitch, a fun filled movie...

then sudddenly i started crying.

crying my heart out, releasing my frustrations and anger on what is happening with me now.

i uttered a silent prayer after

i prayed that if it is not His will that i may find the right person now, just lead me away from people who will lead me in believing that there is something special between us.

im getting tired of this tirade.

Falling in-love with HK

2011-03-03T11:54:00.002+08:00

February 17-20, 2011

pic #1: checking-in at Cebu Pacific counter (hindi halatang excited hahaha)
pic #2: my North Face bag :D ate's gift
pic #3: my passport, already stamped! yey!
pic #4: upon arrival at Hong Kong International Airport
pic #5: brunch at McDonalds HK (kung saan wala silang rice hmp)

HK SBC

2011-03-03T11:49:00.003+08:00

February 17-20, 2011

1st pic: venti, tall, grande
2nd pic: SBC in Mong Kok
3rd pic: SBC in Avenue of Stars

can't resist hehehe

hong kong trip 4

2011-03-03T11:34:00.004+08:00

February 17-20, 2011

pic #1: Hong Kong's MTR
pic #2: "our" street
pic #3: Hong Kong by night
pic #4: HK's famous hawkers
pic #5: Hong Kong by day

hong kong trip 3

2011-03-03T10:44:00.002+08:00

February 17-20,2011

pic #1: restroom at Disneyland Resort
pic #2: on-board Disney Express
pic #3: at Disneyland
pic #4: with Buzz Lightyear
pic #4: with Whiskers, Ocean Park's mascot

hong kong trip 2

2011-03-03T10:21:00.002+08:00

February 17-20, 2011

pic #1: i fell in-love with Experiment 626 a.k.a. Stitch
pic #2: at Avenue of Stars, Hong Kong Harbor
pic #3: resting after visiting Hing Kong Art Museum
pic #4: at Ocean Park
pic #5: before getting our refund for the MTR card, Hong Kong International Airport

hong kong trip

2011-03-03T10:13:00.003+08:00

the happiest place on earth... Hong Kong Disneyland
February 18, 2011

He's Just Not Into Me part 2

2011-02-25T06:11:00.001+08:00

"I may dissect each little thing and put myself out there so much but at least that means that I still care. I may do a lot of stupid shit but I'm still a lot closer to love than you are."
- He's Just Not That Into You

He's Just Not Into Me

2011-02-21T21:40:00.002+08:00

"Girls are taught a lot of stuff growing up. If a guy punches you he likes you. Never try to trim your own bangs and someday you will meet a wonderful guy and get your very own happy ending. Every movie we see, Every story we're told implores us to wait for it, the third act twist, the unexpected declaration of love, the exception to the rule. But sometimes we're so focused on finding our happy ending we don't learn how to read the signs. How to tell from the ones who want us and the ones who don't, the ones who will stay and the ones who will leave. And maybe a happy ending doesn't include a guy, maybe... it's you, on your own, picking up the pieces and starting over, freeing yourself up for something better in the future. Maybe the happy ending is... just... moving on. Or maybe the happy ending is this, knowing after all the unreturned phone calls, broken-hearts, through the blunders and misread signals, through all the pain and embarrassment you never gave up hope. "

- He's Just Not That Into You (2009)

goodbye G

2011-02-20T14:42:00.000+08:00

Feb 18,2011
Disneyland Hong Kong

I'm in the happiest place on earth, waiting for the magical fireworks to start.still i couldn't help but to feel sad and incomplete. Siguro dahil hanggang ngayon, wala ka pa din sa buhay ko.
Medyo matagal na din tayong ganito, sulit na sulit ang unlitext one month ko sayo. ang eyebag ko, hindi na lang "bag" kundi "eye luggage" na kakahintay sa tuwing gagabihin ka. Suki na ko ng LBC sa ilang beses ko ng pagpapadala ng small things para sayo. Piniprisinta ko na ang sarili ko sa office para lang isama sa station nyo.
Sa totoo lang, napapagod na din ako. Napapagod maghintay na mabigyan mo din ako ng ganung attention, masuklian kahit konti yung effort ko. Pero ang million dollar question ng lahat, eh bakit, kayo ba? Na kinakatahimik ko na lang dahil alam ko naman ang sagot, hindi.

Mali ang ginawa ko na nagexpect ako, umasa na baka sakali, the feeling's mutual. I should have seen the signs, should have paid more attention. Signs that definitely say na wala kang gusto sa akin. Alam mo ba nung birthday ko, nangarap ako na makatanggap ng LBC padala galing sayo. assuming din kasi no? pero ang clincher, yung tip of the ice kumbaga, eh yung ilang beses mong hindi pagkausap sa akin ng ilang beses. Magugulat na lang ako, bigla mo na alng ako hindi kikibuin, wala man lang kahit anong explanation. Pagkatapos, bigla din kakausapin mo na naman ako. hindi ako makapagtanong kung bakit. Kasi, again, hindi naman tayo. And ngayon ko lang naisip, kahit pala minsan hindi mo nagawang mapa-ring ang phone ko (meaning, hindi mo ko tinatawagan kahit nga missed call, wala). Ganun ka lang siguro sa lahat ng babaeng kakilala mo, sweet sweetan. Kung hindi mo mahal ang isang tao, huwag ka sanang magpakita ng motibo para mahalin ka nya. Sana be careful next time, hindi mo alam kung sino ang pwedeng mahulog sa sweetness mo G. And yung ang isa sa pinaka-masakit, ang magisip na may "something" ang dalawang tao, pero wala naman pala.

Sabi sa kanta, ikaw na lang ang siyang kulang sa buhay kong ito. Pero mukhang hanggang sa pagkanta na lang ako. Sabi din ng favorite quote ko, minsan me mga bagay na hanggang doon na lang. Kailangan ko na nga sigurong unti-unting tanggapin na hanggang dito lang ang mangyayari sa atin, na hanggang sa pagiging "officemate" at "textmate" lang tayo.

Ayoko ng umiyak, kaya idadaan ko na lang sa pagsulat.

O kay sarap namng isipin
na tayong dalawa ay iisa ang damdamin
aking hinihiling na sabihin mo
ang nilalaman ng 'yong puso
-Pangarap ko ang ibigin ka

HK

2011-02-16T18:53:00.000+08:00

Hong Kong, here we come!

realization

2011-02-16T00:42:00.000+08:00

should have seen the signs, paid more attention. Hoped rather than expected

ang napapala ng matanong...

2011-02-10T19:09:00.001+08:00

G and I were texting last night
L: tuloy na tuloy na sila on Feb 18 blah blah
G: sino sino?
L: si ganito, si ganun blah blah
G: walang sec na kasama?
L: wala eh. Bakit, sino sa sec ang gusto mo makita?
G: hehehehe
L: i knew it! Si __ no? Nyahahaha
G: hahaha. Mag jogging ako bukas
L: iniiba ang usapan hahaha! Ayaw ko ng pumusta
G: hehehe. Magjog talaga ko
L: hmmm..iwas iwas
G: hahaha
L: ang showbiz ng sagot mo! :D
G: hehehe
L: showbiz!
Then hindi na siya nagreply...
L: ayaw ng sumagot. Hindi ko naman sasabihin eh :-) sige, tulog na ko

*ouch...ansakit :-(

members of BAC are going to their provincial station for the building inspection. im a part of the BAC sec, __ is also a part of BAC sec...

this is it

2011-02-05T23:39:00.003+08:00

except na lang kung slow ka, sa tingin ko malalaman mo na kung ano ang problema ko thru Moonstar88's Migraine.

Para mawala na din yung bigat sa loob ko. pag sa mga ganitong bagay, nagiging risk-taker ako.

bahala na kung ano ang maging consequence ng ginawa ko. kung hindi ka na magtext bukas, i'll take that as a sign na you are offended or wala talagang "something" between us.

Ang iniisip ko na lang, we are both mature enough para hindi naman magka-ilangan.

Hindi man maging maganda ang kalalabasan, at least i have said my piece already...

pia

letters to nowhere

2011-01-27T11:30:00.001+08:00

G,
you texted me a while ago kung bakit hindi ako nagtetext. i said nagpapa-miss ako pero mukang hindi effective. as usual, you just laughed. nakaka-sakit na minsan yung ganun.
i'll be honest with you, i went on a date last night, and it made me feel good. somehow, he made me feel appreciated.
pero sabi ko nga, pansinin lang ako ng gusto ko (w/c by the way is YOU), hindi na ko magentertain ng iba.

pia

going the distance

2011-01-19T11:30:00.003+08:00

sana tama ang decision ko...

tampo mode

2011-01-17T12:23:00.000+08:00

G,

sabi nga sa isang forum dito, mababasa na din naman ako, magpapa-ulan na ko ng todo.
nakaka-tampo na kasi eh. minsan pakiramdam ko, importante ako sayo. minsan naman, parang ganito, wala lang.
pero wala naman akong magagawa, hanggang sa pagtatampo lang ang pwede kong gawin...

pia

random thoughts

2011-01-12T20:17:00.000+08:00

"magmahal ka, kahit hindi ka man mahalin sa paraang gusto mo. Ang mahalaga, naging masaya ka kahit papano."

this is me

2011-01-08T16:22:00.002+08:00

While I can’t have you, I long for you. I am the kind of person who would miss a train or a plane to meet you for coffee. I’d take a taxi across town to see you for ten minutes. I’d wait outside all night if I thought you would open the door in the morning. If you call me and say ‘Will you…’ my answer is ‘Yes’, before your sentence is out. I spin worlds where we could be together. I dream you. For me, imagination and desire are very close.- Jeanette Winterson

G

2011-01-08T07:25:00.002+08:00

G,
alam mo bang isa ka sa nagpapangiti sa mga araw na pagod na pagod ako? im always looking forward sa mga kwentuhan natin araw-araw. isa ka sa mga rason kung bakit naeexcite ako pag me kinalaman sa station mo ang pinag-uusapan sa office. at kaya ako nagpapaka-bait ngayon eh para maisama ako ni amo dyan pagdating ng forum..

masyado ko na-analyze ang lahat ng mga bagay at mga sinabi mo. nag-isip, kinilig at nag-assume na naman ako na maybe there is something more sa pinakikita mo. hindi ko naentertain yung possibility na baka sobrang friendly ka lang, or hilig mo lang manlande.

sana dinededma ko na lang, naki-ayon sa daloy na lang kumbaga, para hindi masyadong nahulog ang loob ko. hulog na hulog eh, hindi ako maka-ahon mag-isa.

hindi na talaga ko natuto. me medal na yata ako galing sa ASSUMPTIONISTA Inc...

p.s.
ngayon darating yung chef tony's popcorn na pina-air freight ko. enjoy mo na lang...

pia

G

2011-01-01T15:20:00.001+08:00

http://peyups.com/forums/topic.php?id=2969&page=6&replies=103#post-212977

G,
medyo matagal na din akong hindi nakaka-gawa ng ganito kaya bear with me
the past weeks are the highlights of my 2010. have i told you that you make me smile everytime your name appears in my inbox? ang babaw no? pero little things like that is enough to complete my busy day.
eto na naman ako, analyzing all details, trying very hard to distinguish if you're just uber friendly or me something na. close friends keep on telling me to just enjoy and savor what ever is happening between the 2 of us.
basta kung ano man to, masaya ako. kini-claim ko na na ikaw ang "pahabol" na blessing ni God sa akin for 2010.
i hope to see you again

-pia

prinsipyo

2010-10-08T11:18:00.001+08:00

may mga prinsipyo/paniniwala ka sa buhay na kahit anong gawin mo eh hindi mo magagawang talikuran para lang sa isang tao, or pwede din naman na hindi mo pa nakikita ang taong magpapa-talikod sayo sa mga ito...

defying gravity

2010-09-06T20:40:00.004+08:00

For lcpl

Im still trying to wipe the smile off my face... After more than 3 years, somebody told me the 3 little words every human being wants and longs to hear...

that was almost 3 weeks ago....

Ngayon hindi ko na alam. Im getting mixed signals from you. Tatawag ka, magtetext ng parang wala bg bukas. Then bigla kang hindi na lang magpaparamdam for a day or two, pag nagparamdam ka ulit, parang walang nangyari. I don't know kung dahil sa "ka-bitchy-han" ko minsan sayo kaya nawalan ka na ng gana..

I don't want to commit the same mistakes i did (i.e. naghabol, nagpakita na mas nagmamahal ako) in my previous relationships kaya i tend to be bitchy especially pag "ka-sweetan" moments.

I don't even know if i like you already or i'm just overwhelmed with the attention you have been given me.

Song of the moment:
Too long i've been afraid of
Losing love i guess i've guess lost
Well,if that's love
It comes at much too high a cost
- Defying Gravity (Glee season 1)

one decade

2010-08-03T19:27:00.001+08:00

today, I am thankfully celebrating my 10th year in the Ministry. What started as a compulsary activity eventually led to a decade of loving service. My prayer for today "Lord, do not allow my feet to falter as You guide my way, direct my paths and keep me in Thy presence"

2010-07-23T06:08:00.002+08:00

this made me smile
sana sana sana....

Pia moments

2010-07-13T09:59:00.002+08:00

"good nyt my Pia. Alam mo nagtataka ko, di ka naman camera pero everytime na nagtext ka, napapangiti ako" *swoon*
- kung pagka-gising mo ba naman at eto ang text na mababasa mo, babangon ka pa ba?!!

MPA

2010-05-20T19:34:00.004+08:00

this was my post almost 3 years ago:
http://dreamsemperfidelis.blogspot.com/2007/08/updates.html
and yesterday, it did really happen....
Laarni L. Liwanag, MPA

Thank you Lord!

break

2010-05-04T10:00:00.002+08:00

after a loooooooooooooooong break, medyo sinisipag ako magpost. actually, i can't resist to post who i am voting for this May 2010 elections. hindi kasi pwede sa Facebook since im a known ppcrv staunch volunteer, and we cannot endorse any political candidate. kaya eto na lang, saw this in a newspaper ad:

"kaming mga walang kibo, ay para ke GIBO...."

*will post again para naman sa mga nangyari during my loooong break

flood, rain and ondoy

2009-11-08T14:04:00.002+08:00

September 26, 2009 will be forever remembered by all Filipino people. It will be a painful reminder of the extent of nature's wrath. Also it will be a reminder of how we are able to rise again from the tragedy, rich or poor helped each other.

Be assured of this promise:

“I establish My covenant with you; and all flesh shall never again be cut off by the water of the flood, neither shall there again be a flood to destroy the earth.” Genesis 9:11

muffins

2009-09-25T08:52:00.003+08:00

muffins anyone?

edward and bella

2009-09-22T21:58:00.001+08:00

It doesn't matter how long it would take for love to find you,
what you should know is that...

out there somewhere
their is someone...

someone who will love you...

more than how Romeo loved Juliet

more than how Jack loved Rose

and even more than how
Edward loved Bella...

Sender:
Richelle
+639274480448

Received:
20:42:48
20-09-2009

coffee

2009-09-11T11:27:00.004+08:00

Last Saturday while in Starbucks with Richelle and Lester, nagpustahan kami ni Richelle, pinag-seserve ko kasi siya ng 9:30am dahil hindi siya makakapag-serve ng 7pm dahil sa UAAP...

Ganito yung usapan namin:

L: pustahan hindi ka makakapagserve

R: pustahan, makakapag-serve ako oh

L: pustahan hinde

R: o sige, pag nag-serve ako, hindi ka magkakape ng 1 week!

L: ha! yun lang pala, o sige! (malakas ang loob ko kasi 85% of the time, hindi siya nakakapag-serve)

R: kapag nag-break ka sa pustahan natin, magko-confess ka ke Fr. A!

L: sure! pag nanalo ako, 1 week mo ko ililibre ng frap

R: sure!

habang si Lester eh nakikinig lang...

The following day, Sunday 10am. nagtext si Lester:

Lester: patay ka, nag-seserve si Richelle

Laarni: syet! wala akong kape ng 1 Linggo!

Backgrounder: You know how i love fraps... no, erase that, i live for fraps....

Sunday evening, nagtext ang frog:

Richelle: nag-serve ako kanina :)

Laarni: i know... syet... kanina after manood ng movie, nag-ice cream na lang ako :(

Richelle: naawa ako sayo teh... sige na nga pwede ka na uminom ng kape

Laarni: hinde, patutunayan ko na kaya ko to...

me and my stupid pride...

kahapon, while nakasakay sa service, dumaan ba naman sa harap ng Immigration. Me starbucks dun, parang nang-aasar pa yung katabi ko, "arns, masarap ba kape dyan?". tumango na lang ako, sabay buntong-hininga

5 days na... 2 days to go...

gustong-gusto ko na pumunta at mag-order ng "1 venti mocha frappucino"

sweldo pa naman ngayon... waaaaah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Note: makukuntento na lang muna ko sa pictures for now... except kung hindi ko talaga mapigilan at magkape din ako mamya after ng meeting...

*evil grin*

updates updates at updates ulit

2009-09-09T14:08:00.003+08:00

natagalan na naman ako mag-update tsk tsk tsk...

what kept me busy?

august 18-21: risk comminucation coordination meeting with DOH and partner agencies like DND, PCG, DILG...

the following week, kinuha ko yung offset ko kasi nasarapan ako ng tulog hehehe

august 28: dinner and ASAP Sessionistas with gen, vera and angela (my elementary barkada)
i think this is the 4th time na yata na lumalabas kami kaya medyo nagkakatotoo na yung plans namin na get-together every month. san nga ba kami next month... the concert made me a certified Richard Poon fan! *swoon* :)

pagka-report ko sa office MOnday morning, me bureau order na naman na bago sa table ko kaya:

september 1-4: gender and development naman sa baguio

june 2006 (ay, nagpunta din pala kami nila sing para mag SM nung april 2008) pa ang huli kong punta sa summer capital, graduation gift ni ate. kasama ko si ate, andres and his family tsaka si lester. memorable yun kasi 1st time na me kasama ako na kaibigan ko sa bakasyon. memorable din kasi nabisita ko si teejay, yung classmate ko nung college, sa PMA

kainis lang, kasi pagkita ko sa camera ko, naiwan ko sa laptop yung memory card! grrr!!! buti sana kung yung batteries lang, madaling mapalitan...

infairness naman, nakapagpahinga ako. Pero hindi pa yung bonggang-bonggang pahinga na inaasam asam at ipinangako ko sa sarili ko once matapos ang A H1N1 activities. pero oks na yun, wag ng choosy hehehe

in between, sinisingit ko ang pag-attend ng klase at pag-gawa ng mga requirements...

shucks, matatapos na ang semester, wala pa din ako naipapasa na questionnaire at revised Chapter 2... Sir, bear with me please!!!

last satuday (September 05), i attended the CLP of Singles for Christ

yep, after a looong loong time na "niligawan" ako para umattend, i finally said Yes and gave it a try. Actually, obligatory sa mga singles ng Ministry ang pag-attend at me evaluation kami after ng 13 Saturdays hehehe! though before pa binaba ni Padre yung letter nya, naka-set na naman ako na pupunta ako. (and it doesn't hurt na si pat na ang unit head hahahaha!!!)

hanggang dito na lang muna :) will post pics from my baguio training

EDITED: while reviewing my posts, napansin ko na di ko pa pala naikukwento ang aking bagong baby! bad! you know what happened to my beloved Vivi db? hay, until now di ko pa din magawang idelete yung pics at pinaka-huling video nya.... anyway, i bought Chammy last july 11. pagka-panganak pa lang sa kanya, pina-reserve ko na agad ke teddy. technically, tita nya si Vivi :) they have the same color and breed (dachshund) yun nga lang medyo lumabas na yung pagka-wirehaired ni Chammy kaya mabalahibo yung part ng dibdib nya. fernando jose nga tawag namin sa kanya hehehe! i'll post her pics kapag me maganda na siyang posing, me pagka-camera shy kasi

touching

2009-08-27T13:13:00.003+08:00

i was emptying my Yahoo email account a while ago, sobrang dami na ng messages na hindi ko na nabasa so i've decided to delete those messages. One of the messages dated 4 years ago moved me, this came from my Jfinex yahoo group. I don't know kung sino ang author, and after reading, teary-eyed ako...

....Walking around the mall by myself, I bumped into
someone I never thought of seeing again. At
first, I didn’t know what to do. Should I
approach her? Should I say hi? What should I say
to her? Does she still remember me?
After all these years, she looked pretty much the
same to me. Her hair is still short, so is her
height; and she still wears that sweet smile on
her face. She is still the same attractive girl I
met 8 years ago, but it felt different seeing her
again.

Here in front of me is the first person who made
me human, the first person who brought joy,
laughter, pain and suffering to my life. The
first person who made me feel wanted, and the
first person who made me feel worthless. And
after how many years, I can still remember how I
habitually made phone calls to her every 8 0’
clock, after the chain of soap operas she
fanatically monitored; how I would surprise her
with different gifts that vary from simple
letters to baked cookies to surprise parties; how
I loved holding her hand while we walked around,
with her strong grip as if she didn’t want to let
me go; how I loved everything about her, her
smile, her eyes, and how she made me feel.

Here in front of me is the person who made me cry
buckets of tears, use up boxes of Kleenex, and
close my door to the world. Here in front of me
is the person who taught me that life isn’t all
about having fun; that there is more to life than
endless phone calls, gifts, long walks, and yes,
there is more to life than love. That life
doesn’t end when love fades; that people walk in
and out of your life and you can’t do anything
but accept it, because that’s how life is.

And when I think about it now, it just makes me
smile to know that as pathetic as I was when I
was moaning over a love lost, I became a better
person because of her. All the things she taught
me and all the memories I have of her are stored
as a chapter of my life; one of the best chapters
of my life that I will never forget -- and I will
always be thankful for that.

And there she stood, in front of me, and I have
been staring at her for the past few minutes. I
still didn’t know what to say. And when she
finally saw me, she grabbed my hand as she used
to do years ago, and greeted me with her sweet
smile. She was in a hurry and I didn’t want to
keep her for long.

As I walked away, I knew that what just happened
was a sign, not of a second chance, but that life
is never about closing your door to the world.
That life is about being human, that it is all
right to cry and to make mistakes. And that
however painful love can be, it is the only thing
that makes us truly human...

huling hirit

2009-08-21T21:17:00.002+08:00

There are things worth pursuing for...
those that makes you happy...
those that makes you complete...
those that makes you feel special...

But there are things that
makes you happy
but are not worth pursuing for...

Reason?
They make you feel worthless in the process..

i hope this will be the last time i'll be writing about this...

postscript

2009-08-09T22:38:00.003+08:00

just got back from a dinner with volt and les. Volt's getting married! As in! sa aming 4 nila volt,tin and les (my support group), volt's the least person na iniisip namin na magpapakasal. Pano ba naman, kung high maintenance kami, ano pang tawag sa kanya? Hehehe...and natanggap na namin na tatandang dalaga at binata kami.

Hay, so happy for him :-)

Kelangan na talagang mag-diet in preparation for the wedding of the affluent and very affluent hehehe

Note: This picture was taken during ICP's dinner dance in Wack Wack 2 years ago.

from l-r: lester,laarni,tin and voltaire (plus si sing hahaha)

getting old

2009-08-09T13:59:00.003+08:00

I was browsing my friedster friends' profiles this afternoon, some of my highschool batchmates have already gone a long way in terms of their personal lives. some are already married, others are engaged. a couple has a kid or two of their own. 1 is widowed. all of them are reminders that we are not getting any younger anymore, and im being slowly being left behind...

busy...

2009-08-07T07:58:00.003+08:00

What’s keeping Laarni busy? Well, aside sa 3x a week na masteral classes, sinisingit ko ang swimming lessons. Yes, swimming lessons :) it’s a known fact na frustration ko ang maka-langoy. Shiela invited me to try kasi siya nung summer, nakapag-basic course na and nakaka-langoy na talaga siya! Kaya nung me extra money, enroll na ko agad sa Bert Lozada Swimming School. Sa St. Stephen ang venue, and dahil sa sched ko, twice a week lang ako nakaka-punta, minsan nga once lang. Kaya yung 10 sessions ko, 1 buwan ang inabot hahaha! The coach assigned to me was Coach Sumner, kung me taong nakasalo ng patience nung sinabog eto ni Lord, siguro asa harap siya na pila kaya andami niyang nakuhang patience hehehe. First day pa lang, tinapat ko na siya na ako yung taong hindi nakakasunod sa instructions at matigas talaga ang ulo ko. Ayun, tinawanan lang niya ako. Mukang hindi pa naman siya nagsisisi na kinuha niya akong estudyante. Marunong na ko mag-glide, freestyle (na pahirapan pa) and nakaka-float na din ako, and I can do laps na kaso talagang hinihingal ako. I still have 3 more sessions to go, and balak naman ni Shiela na mag-member sa St. Stephen para makagamit kami ng pool everyday. Ayan, unti unti ko na natutupad yung mga gusto kong gawin eversince. Ang driving kaya kelan? Hhhmmm…. :)

Lesson from swimming:
“Mas mabuti ng maka-inom, kesa maka-singhot ng tubig” – Coach Sumner

shoutout

2009-07-21T15:38:00.000+08:00

"i miss you... but missing you is a constant reminder of what will never be and what i will never have."

good news!

2009-07-17T10:51:00.002+08:00

yehey!!!! sa wakas, after 2 and 1/2 months, pull-out na kami from rendering 24 hours airport duty. nagshift na kasi ang response ng department, mitigation na lang and massive information campaign na ang gagawin para sa control ng A H1N1 virus. bgayon alam na kung bakit hindi ako masyado nakakapag-post ng update dito.

don't get me wrong, trabaho yun kaya kelangan gawin at tanggapin. but we have to face the fact na nakakapagod at sobrang exhausting yung nangyaring airport duty namin. plus yung mga backlog na nag-accumulate sa main office, kasi it doesn't mean naman na excempted kami sa regular office duties such as inspections, IEC developing, etc. hay, hindi ko naenjoy ang summer vacation dahil dito dahil nagstart kami ng may 1, 2009 (kami ni mam jo ang nag-bukas, kami din ang huling nag-duty nung wednesday. parang pabasa lang hahaha!)

ano ang hindi ko mamimiss sa airport duty:

1. yung sabay sabay na dating ng mga malalaking flights na me sakay na 300+ pax each. pag 10pm na, ayan na ang JAl, Nortwest, Cathay. fireworks na!!!!

2. yung puyat lalo na pag me delay na flight (lalo na sa NAIA terminal 2)

3. yung susubo mo na lang yung pagkain biglang iaanounce na flight

4. yung lahat ng bay, me flight na dumating

5. yung "unwanted smell" ng ibang pax. yung iba kasi nakainom tapos nakatulog sa flight. no offense po ha

6. yung mga maiinit na ulo ng pax na akala mo eh kami ang me kasalanan ng lahat ng paghihirap na na-experience nila sa bansang pinang-galingan nila

7. yung mga masusungit na ground crew na hindi nagdidistribute agad ng checklist kaya kami ang nasisigawan ng mga pax

8. yung sakit due to pagtayo ng ilang oras sa counter

pero siyempre, me mga mamimiss din ako sa airport duty

1. yung mga makukulit at mababait na MIA medical (mam natz, mam michelle, mam analyn, mam tweet, si doc bambi, kuya glenn, mam baby, si mark! si budz)

2. yung ice cream at garlic bread ng SQ sa gabi :)

3. "artista-watching" hahaha! sayang talaga, pinalagpas ko si Rico Blanco! hmp!

4. mga mababait na F.A. especially ng Qantas, Qatar tsaka Emirates

5. mga matatangkad na F.A. ng KLM! hahaha!

6. yung pwede ako pumasok ng 9am...excused naman kasi sobrang traffic papuntang airport

7. yung off the following day

8. libreng lunch and dinner

9. adobo ni kuya nelson

10. and siyempre, yung ground crew ng Cathay Pacific na night duty. me nakakakilala ba ke Ronald Herrera?!? hehehehe!

ngayon naman ang ipagdadasal ko ay sana magkaroon kami ng OT pay.... :)

2009-07-15T17:10:00.001+08:00

Almost 2 weeks ago, i bought my new phone. Uhm,actually, credit card 12 mos to pay ke ricky hehehe.
What's my new baby? the nokia E63,red :-) nagtataka siguro yung iba bakit bumili ako ng bago ganung im still enjoying my n6300. di ko din alam, basta pagka-kita ko sa kanya,paghawak at pagtry ko, alam kong dapat magkaroon ako ng isa hahaha! Ayun,umiral ang pagiging compulsive ko, at napabili ng wala sa oras.

Review
lester: so laarni, how's your new phone?
Laarni: para siyang boylet, isa siyang malaking eye candy! Hinahanap hanap ko yung features na nasa n6300 ko,like yung shortcut sa pagtetext, yung smileys, recently used #s. Pero parang pag nagbreak lang yan eh, nasanay ka lang kasi kaya hirap ka maka-adjust dun sa bagong dumating sa buhay mo, naks! yun pala,mas madaming good characteristic yung bagong dumating,in this case, mas madaming magandang features yung e63. una na dyan,wifi ready! At san ka makakakita na me ms word,excel, at powerpoint. And kung di ka pa din kuntento,ayan me zip file pa at adobe reader hahaha! Katulad ngayon, phone blogging ang drama ko ngayon :-)
and isa pang gusto ko sa new baby ko, pwede ko etong ilabas kapag pakiramdam ko tingin sa akin ng katabi ko eh walang pera! Sa sobrang ganda (at mahal) nya, luluhod ang mga mapang-mata hahaha!

nbn 4 taping

2009-07-04T11:11:00.002+08:00

02 july 2009

Doc and i are currently here in the dressing room of nbn 4. The Bureau was invited to guest sa Republic Service talk show. Siya yung pinadala ng office and as usual, sinama na naman ako. Andito na kami,and ganito pala itsura ng studio hahaha. well,actually, they are now doing him (his makeup) na hahaha! Kanina nanghihingi siya ng valium sa akin, at nilalamig siya hehehe!
Low tech nman d2, ppt 2003 edition lang ang meron sila, 2007 ang ginawa ko.
Anyway, we are now in studio A waiting for the taping to start. Hindi na nagsasalita ang okraytis kong boss wahahaha! they are about to start na :-)

-phone blogging using my new baby, e63 :)

5 years ago

2009-06-24T14:00:00.002+08:00

Sa paglilinis ko ng cabinet and drawer ko, me nakita ako na kapirasong notebook. And eto ang nakasulat:

July 15, 2004
5 years from now:

1. Graduate na ko ng college

2. im starting my masteral studies

3. engage na ke morch :) (hopefully)

4. already working in a bank/financial institution

5. head na ko ng PPCRV sa Immaculate

6. me experience na...censored

June 24, 2009
5 years later (21 days short)

1. Graduate na ko May 5 2006 with a degree in Banking and Finance - check

2. Im finishing my masteral studies in Public Administration. 2 subjects na lang, then comprehensive examination, then research writing and then defense

3. Siyempre hindi na to mangyayari na sa kanya ako mae-engage,Morch and I broke up april 9 2007. Still wala pa din akong boyfriend after 2 years

4. I've been working since before my May graduation. I've worked for Times Trading from March 2006 - December 15 2007 as a Marketing Admin Assistant, then I transferred to Bureau of Quarantine on December 17 2007 as a Health Education and Promotion Officer, I'm on my 2nd year na. No banks or fianncial institution for me, hindi ko lang siguro talaga gusto

5. Head na ko ng PPCRV ng Immaculate Conception Parish Tayuman since Election '07, aside from that, Im the District Coordinator for District 2 Manila

6. Wala kong experience, because I've realized that it is not important. and peer pressure lang kaya ko nasulat 5 years ago yun.

3 out of 5...not bad. And God has given me more than what I've asked for. Me kasunod na list yun, 10 years from that day naman pero saka ko na lang isusulat

one of those days

2009-06-24T13:03:00.004+08:00

March 21, 2007

Hindi ko alam kung paano sisimulan eto. Paano mo nga ba sisimulan yung isang bagay na tatapos sa isang napaka-halagang parte ng buhya mo? Siguro simulan ko sa pagkukwento. Marami ng nangyari, mga pagbabagong naganap. Nung una, malakas ang loob ko na sabihin na "ah, kaya jo yan!". magmula sa simpleng pag-intindi kapag hindi ka nakakatawag, hanggang sa pagtanggap ng mga salitang hindi ko naisip na manggagaling sayo, tinanggap at tiniis ko. Andun kasi yung pag-asa ko na kapag tinanggap ko lahat, in time, mare-realize mo yung pagkukulang mo, mamahalin mo na ulit akoo katulad ng sa dati, at babalik tayo kung saan tayo huminto.

Pero hindi pala ganun kadali yun. Natatandaan ko yun sa mga masasakit na pamamaraan. Lagi kong sinasabi, mabait naman ako, pero bakit nagagawa akong saktan ng taong mahal ko? Pero nalaman ko, hindi pala guarantee na kapag mabait ka, libre ka na sa mga unfair na bagay sa paligid mo. Natutunan ko din na kahit buong-buo ang ibigay mong pagmamahal sa isang tao, hindi yun sapat para hindi ka niya iwanan. Natutunan ko din na kahit anong gawin mo, hinding-hindi mo mapipilit ang isang tao na mahalin ka katulad ng pagmamahal mo sa kanya. Nakakalungkot, dahil more than half a year ko ng pinipilit ang sarili ko sayo. Hindi lang dalawa o tatlong beses mo ng sinabi na maghiwalay na tayo, pero dahil sa pagpupumilit ko, napilitan ka pa din na bigyan ulit "tayo" ng ilang pagkakataon.

Akala ko kaya kong gawin yung para sa ating dalawa. Akala ko kapag nagtiis ako, magiging daan yun para mahalin mo ulit ako. at akala ko, darating pa yung araw na lahat ng pagtitiis, paghihintay at pagsasakripisyo ko, masusuklian at maaapreciate mo.

Akala ko kaya ko pa, hindi na pala. Minsan hindi ko namamalayan, umiiyak na pala ko, naiiyak ako sa tuwing naiisip ko yung sitwasyon na kinalalagyan ko. Siguro nga tama ka, na ang pagmamahal, dapat hinihintay at hindi hinihingi o pinipilit. Kung meron akong pinag-sisisihan sa apat na taon natin, siguro yun yung hinayaan ko na dumating yung time na mahal na mahal na pala kita. Pinag-sisisihan ko din na hindi pa siguro kita minahal ng sobra. Siguro kung mas higit pa yung binigay ko, baka sakali, mahal mo pa din ako ngayon.

I am finally, finally, letting you go. It pains me knowing that there will be no more "us" but rather two people, leading separate lives from now on. Hindi ko na siguro kailangan pang sabihin na mahal na mahal kita. Siguro kahit papaano, naparamdam ko yun sayo.

Laarni

I was cleaning my cabinet ng makita ko mga stuff na galing sa kanya. Then I saw this letter, one of the many letters i wrote during the course of our 4 year relationship. Those are letters na sinulat ko pero hindi ko binibigay sa kanya, sinusulat ko lang kapag sobrang bigat na ng nararamdaman ko. This letter was written 18 days before we broke up, everything was falling apart and i was contemplating on giving up already. But, I still decided to hold on. April 9, he decided to end things with me...

It's been 2 years and 2 months, i thought im already over him. But this past week brought many memories that made me think about him more. Pero sabi nga ni chelle, wala na kong kakapitan.... lapses lang to...

narsi

2009-06-23T15:42:00.009+08:00

the many faces of Laarni

Eto ang tinatawag na Narcissism or sabi nga sa Wikipedia, the trait of excessive self-love based on self-image or ego hehehehe!

wala lang magawa sa office :D

kwento

2009-06-23T09:38:00.005+08:00

Liturgical Congress nung saturday (June 2o, 2009) sa SMX Convention Center. All members ng sub-ministries ng Archdiocese of Manila. 5,100 ang umattend, hindi pa kasama ang support staff at organizers.

Biruan nga namin:
1. Kung me dala na ko ng A (H1N1) virus (dahil galing ako sa airport duty ko), hundreds agad ang mahahawaan ko. Eh ako pa, Ms. Congeniality ako. Lakad dito, lakad dun. Bati dito, bati dun hehehe
2. Kung pasasabugin ang SMX, walang magseserve pagdating ng Linggo sa mga kani-kaniyang parishes hehehe. Thank God at wala namang nag-attempt na ganun.

Another thing happened...

Curious ako kung SBC boy attended the Congress. So i texted him

L: hi, asa congress ka ba?

SBC: yup, san ka banda?
(then he started calling, pero hindi ko sinagot)

L: uhm, asa dulo kami eh F1 (knowing na nasa kabilang dulo ang Vicariate nya)

SBC: anong color nyo (referring sa uniform na gamit namin)
(then he started calling again but this time di ko na sinagot kasi he has a tendency to be persistent)

and then voila! bigla siyang dumating. tinginan nga lahat ng taga ICP na nakaka-alam na me "something" sa pagpunta nya. At ang mga ngiti nila, priceless! Ako naman, natural lang pero medyo kinakabahan, siguro dahil dun na lang ulit kami nagkita ng up close. He said hi, and asked where Monsi is. Sabi ko wala pa, and I asked him kung sa Vicariate ba niya siya sumama. Oo daw. After nun, he said goodbye since magstart na yung Congress.

When he left, hiyawan ang mga kasama ko. Lester pointed out na I was sparkling daw, sabi ko nye nye nye! Sabi ni Les, ganda daw ng jacket na suot ni SBC, sabi ko oo nga eh. Isang salita ko lang daw, mapapasa-akin yung jacket hahahaha!!!

and then the Congress started.

But what made me smile the whole day?

It was the thought na sa 5,099 na tao sa loob ng SMX Convention Center, nakita pa din nya ko at napuntahan....

pero on the other hand, sabi nga ni Jolo, reminder daw yun na lumalaki na talaga ko kasi nakita pa din ako ni SBC hahahaha!

sari-saring posts

2009-05-26T15:51:00.002+08:00

tarpaulin-airport drama-cebu-bohol-tarpaulin-iligan-cagayan de oro-cebu-holy week activities-tarpaulin- Facebook-swine flu-airport duty-Twilight saga-Influenza A H1N1

ayan ang summary ng aking almost 2 months na hindi pagpo-post dito hehehe...

promise hindi na mauulit na hindi ako regular na magsusulat :D

goodbye

2009-04-05T21:58:00.001+08:00

september 14, 2008 - april 5, 2009

Vivi....

you will always be loved and the joy that you gave us will always be remembered. goodbye my baby...

realization 101

2009-02-21T13:05:00.002+08:00

i finally deleted the cookie pictures in my friendster album...

why?

why? because it will be a constant reminder of what will never be and what i will never have

happy ending

2009-02-15T22:17:00.003+08:00

it's nice to see that things have been settled between two good friends. at least, me kasama na ulit ako mag-starbucks, manlait at mang-amoy kung sino ang bading! hahahahahaha! seriously, it's nice that they had already patched whatever their differences were.

love you guys :)

post-valentine's day date. actually, nakita lang namin si dae sa sm hehehe

epilogue

2009-02-14T23:31:00.004+08:00

For you,

I was attracted to you since the first day that I saw you during one of those Sunday masses. I knew that you are friends with the other pastoral workers, but I was too hesitant to ask them about you. That smile of yours is one of the guilty pleasures I enjoy every time I’ll see you. Not long after, introductions were made between us. Thanks to the help of a mutual friend, we started exchanging messages which helped me in knowing you more, and eventually, liking you more.

During one of those exchanges of SMS, you were able to confirm my greatest fear in this blossoming “friendship”. Yes, you were married and have a 7-year old child. The revelation sent me celebrating the new year with a heavy heart. You said that you are separated, but I was too afraid to ask what does that separation means. Geographically separated? Legally separated?

Fear crept in, I chose to keep my silence for fear of knowing more, and eventually, for fear of being hurt once again. What you had disclosed did not hinder me from being attached to you, but I took it as a challenge, keeping in mind that you are already separated. I was willing to take the risk, the risk of being ridiculed and be the center of gossip in the society that separation is not accepted wholeheartedly. I was willing to cross the line, and I was also willing to take for granted people who set the line that I was willing to cross. You called me by the name which means “virtuous”. I claimed the name as if it was really mine and you even went as far as calling me “my virtuous”.

You never failed to make me smile and brighten my day. You also never cease to amaze me as I discover something new about you each passing day. You made me feel as if I am one of the important persons in your life. During my special day, you surprised me with one of your God-given talent which makes you standout among guys I know. The cookies sent me smiling all throughout the day. Every time I was feeling down, I’ll just take a look in my mobile phone, and view your gift, and I’ll be feeling ok again. Friends kept telling me to be cautious of my emotions in case this will be like my previous “encounters” with guys who have habits of being extra sweet but in the end will left me hanging. But being the hard-headed that I am known for, I never listened. I let myself fall for you; I fell very hard for you. And today, I am suffering the consequences of my actions. I assumed that the “friendship” could lead to something, and I expected that we share the same feelings for each other, I was wrong.

Days have passed and still, I got no response from you. I’ve stopped communicating with you for the fear of losing my self respect, making a fool out of myself, almost to the point of pleading for your response. I am left hanging once again, not knowing what’s next? Tell me if this is the end of our “friendship, be man enough to admit that you have no intention of reciprocating whatever feelings I have for you. Have the courage to tell me that it is better to keep our distance from each other, that this is the best for the two of us. Then a peaceful heart and mind will once again reign within me…Is this really the end bossing? Tell me, so that I can start searching again for my Noah...

Pia

021409
2230H

happy hearts day

2009-02-14T22:35:00.004+08:00

it's the time of the year when people becomes sentimental, hearts and red are the "in" thing and the time when Cupid makes his yearly appearance...

Yes, it's February 14, Valentine's Day once again.

FEb.14 has been equated with lovers eversince I can remember. It's the time when lovers or those "in a relationship" (the term that people used nowadays thanks to Friendster) profess and show their love to their respective partners. It's also the time of the year when single people like me tends to become bitter and jealousy creeps in. hehehe!

During my first year as a unatttached person, i dreaded celebrating Valentine's Day. I hate it when I see couples showing public display of affection (well, even in ordinary days, i still cringe) and of course, ladies holding their own sets of flowers. sigh....

Seriously, being single for almost 2 years now, i've learned some valuable lessons that helped me face February 14, 2009 with a smile in my face.

first lesson:

being single is not equated to being miserable

second lesson:

you don't need Valentine's Day to show your love to your loved ones

and third lesson, and the most valuable lesson for me:

February 14 is not only for those "in a relationship". Valentine's Day is for everyone: for those who have loved and lost, for those who are inlove, for those who are secretly longing and waiting for that special person to come to their lives, for those who are single and chose to take the path of single blessedness... more importantly, Valentine's Day is about celebrating with those people who really matters...

*spent Valentine's Day with my grad school friends, Cla and Cris, at Gateway :)

2009-02-13T13:45:00.001+08:00

ang sagot sa tanong na walang sagot ay acceptance...

senti

2009-02-07T22:22:00.002+08:00

im liking you more and more

kahit na sabihin natin na deadma ka most of the time

but everytime naman na magkausap tayo, you make me feel as if i am special in your life

takot akong magtanong

takot akong malaman yung totoo

takot akong ma-reject ulit

pero mas natatakot akong isipin na darating din yung time, matitigil din itong kalokohan ko...

*senti mode

the sweetest thing

2009-02-02T21:01:00.002+08:00

dumaan siya kanina sa church before magstart ang 6pm mass, binati nya ko ng happy birthday, then me inabot siya sa akin tapos nagpaalam na... hindi ako nakatiis, i opened the paper bag. i saw first the letter then the i opened the box, voila! i saw the cookies, first the letter "P" then the "i"... waah!!!

he baked the cookies daw kanina sa office....

buong misa, naka-smile ako. nawirduhan na yata yung mga nasa paligid ko na nagsisimba. paguwi ko na bahay.

up to now, di pa din nawawala ang smile ko..

bossing, thank you for making my birthday memorable :)